Ever stayed in a relationship longer than felt charming because you were afraid that if you leave that one particular person you won’t find love again?
Here’s the news, friends…
Jobs are not the source of money; they are the channel that delivers it.
Relationships are not the source of love; they are an outlet for it.
If you go through life thinking that one particular job or person is the source of your abundance or happiness, it is easy to get needy— which is not a good look.
Neediness is not sexy. When you’re late, the train is delayed. When you need a new job, the market is terrible. When you’re hungry to be in a relationship, everyone you meet is unavailable. We get attached to the idea that certain people, places, and things will make us happy once we acquire them. But this is an illusion, and the way to break through is with a healthy level of detachment.
I know detachment gets a bad rap these days, and I want to clarify that I do not mean disengagement. I mean trusting that you are enough and that your desires are on the way. True detachment is sexy. We all want to date the person just out of reach. We all want to hire the person who everyone is competing over.
So how do we cultivate a healthy level of detachment?
By finding a way to access the actual source.
It will surprise approximately no one that my favorite way to access “source” is through meditation. When we de-excite our nervous system with Vedic Meditation we move beyond neediness, beyond attachment, and we access the unbounded source of pure consciousness. We access the only place that fulfillment resides, which is inside. (The brain also floods with the bliss chemicals dopamine and serotonin, which helps.)
Once you have a means by which to access that source energy, through meditation, it is much easier to let go of the illusion that one job can make you or break you or that one person can make you or break you. You’re able to feel tangibly that jobs are not the source of money, they are the channel that delivers it. That relationships are not the source of your love it is a channel for you to deliver it.
Once we have access to the source of fulfillment, creativity, love, and abundance, we can start to interpret our desires differently. Instead of functioning as a place to go to acquire fulfillment, our desires become an indicator of where nature is using us to deliver our gifts. We can then use these desires as inspiration to act; to share our gifts and give all of ourselves. It might sound hippie-dippy, but give it a try. For one day try asking yourself, “what can I give to each situation?” instead of “what can I take?” and see if you don’t enjoy yourself more. We can choose to believe that nature wants us to succeed, or we can choose to believe that happiness lies on the other side of the struggle to acquire things. But one way is a lot more fun.